Sometimes people ask about my qualifications.
It’s a fair question with a simple answer: I have none.
There’s absolutely no reason I should be doing pretty much anything I’m doing these days.
I was a high school dropout and a juvenile delinquent. I learned to drive by stealing cars, but since I was a slow learner, I kept crashing them into mailboxes. (A long, true story.)
I wasn’t especially dedicated to my first part-time job as a 14-year-old dishwasher. Whenever I received a pot that was especially difficult to clean, I walked outside and threw it in the dumpster. This strategy worked well until the restaurant ran out of pots. The owner and I had a discussion, and it was agreed I should find another means of employment.
I abandoned a series of other part-time jobs by not showing up to work. No notice, no phone call, no request for the check to be sent in the mail.
I did make it to college, where I performed fairly well—once I learned to work the system. My degree was in Sociology, a fun and interesting subject that led to exactly zero job opportunities. By the time I graduated, I didn’t want a job anyway, so I bought and sold coffee instead.
I never learned higher math—not any kind, and not at all. No algebra, geometry, calculus, or anything else you’re told is essential for adulthood. I snuck into grad school without taking the GRE, which is a good thing, because when I took a practice test later, I placed in the 15th percentile for quantitative. (To which I wondered: Wow, who are all the people less than the 15th?)
My first quarter in grad school I had to prove competency in statistics by passing a course. This was a disaster from start to finish. Imagine being thrown into a classroom where every word is foreign to you. Sink or swim, right? There’s actually another strategy: just tread water. My strategy was: show up to every class and never be late. I sat in the front row and asked meaningless questions to demonstrate I was paying attention. (“Could you repeat that last part?” “What would happen if you switched those two numbers around?” “Oh, I see. That’s interesting.”)
On the day of the final exam I looked at the paper and understood virtually none of the questions. I wrote gibberish on the front side and drew an arrow to indicate something on the reverse side. On this side I composed a list of “Top 10 Things I Learned During Statistics Class.” I made sure a few of them actually related to assigned materials, even if I didn’t understand them.
I somehow received a B- and placed a thank-you gift of coffee beans outside the professor’s door. Then I dropped out of the program, but that’s another story.
When I first went to Africa, I was given a job carrying boxes around and managing a warehouse. I was fairly good at the box-carrying part, but then I learned that more skills were required. Dude. The boxes need to be placed on pallets. The pallets need to be shrink-wrapped. Talk about bait and switch!
Someone showed me how to shrink-wrap a pallet, and then someone else showed me again. Then the first guy showed me one more time—“Hey, let me give you some help with that pallet”—but soon they could all tell I was a lost cause. I’d dutifully wrap my pathetic-looking pallets, with way too much shrink-wrap and boxes protruding from all sides, then someone would come along after me and do it right.
I never learned any languages, but one time I got roped into doing French-English translation at a conference. I had very low expectations for my ability to handle this task, and these low expectations remained unmet after the first session. I approached the organizers: “Uh, it’s OK if you want to bring in someone else,” I said. “Oh,” they said, “we already have.”
These stories may sound like they are from long ago, before I found my way in the world. Perhaps. But let the record show I still have virtually no marketable skills of any kind.
Among other deficiencies, I don’t know how to do anything mechanical whatsoever. I used to say I could do nothing more than screw in a light bulb, but then light bulbs started getting complicated. It’s off the list now.
All That to Say
If I suddenly had to get a job for the first time as an adult, I have no idea what I’d do. Yeah, I’d figure something out, but the prospect terrifies me.
When I think about what I’m actually qualified for, it’s a very short list. I’m qualified to stand behind a counter and accept your money, preferably in exact change and closely supervised by someone who carefully counts the cash register after my shift. I’m qualified to be the man at the donut shop who informs you how you can acquire an additional, original glazed merely through the purchase of two others.
At best, I’m qualified to make $11 an hour with no benefits.
When I walk through the First Class security line, I smile at the employee tasked with the job of keeping the peasant travelers out. I’d like to think I smile because it’s good to be nice, but it’s also because I know the secret: I should be that guy. I’m just an imposter.
When I’m asked to speak to companies, I look out at the people in the audience. Sure, some of them are occupied with their iPhones, and if alcohol is involved, some of them are a little tipsy. But given a large enough group, I can look and see that some of them are hanging on every poorly-phrased sentence I produce. They write things in their notebooks that presumably relate to what I am saying, as if they should remember them or follow-up on them later. Why? No clue. But this much I know is true: I’m damned fortunate.
Yes, I should be that guy asking if you’d like to add on an order of fries at the fast-food restaurant, the guy who just kept doing menial work with no purpose because he was never qualified for anything else.
But for some reason, I’m not. For some reason, I escaped the life I deserved and found a life on the other side.
What This Means
All of this means a few things for you and me both.
First, forget about what you’re actually qualified to do. It’s irrelevant and no one cares.
Second, if you never learned higher math either, it’s nothing to worry about. You’ll be fine.
Third, if I can somehow craft a livelihood out of virtually no qualifications or marketable skills, surely you can too.
Fourth, when you do find something that works for you, you should be very grateful, every day.
Because when you’re qualified to do nothing but operate a cash register under close supervision, and the world somehow entrusts you with greater duties, you’d better treat these duties with the diligence they deserve.
I don’t care if you’re a religious person or not, every day you should pause and ask the powers that be “Really? I get to do this? I’m not living on the streets, begging for spare change?”
If that’s the case, and you are in fact doing anything other than handing out donuts, inspecting tickets, or sitting on the sidewalk all afternoon, join the club of the surprised. You’d better say to yourself, as I regularly do: I have no idea how this happened, but damned if I won’t do everything I can to preserve it.
Regardless of your actual qualifications, there’s one thing that no one can give you and no one can take away: the will to keep going. For that task, you are supremely qualified.
###
Update: The “Working from the Road” class mentioned on Friday is now sold out—thanks for your interest.
Image: OW
October 10, 2011
moom
It’s not qualifications that matter but what skills and abilities you have. But qualifications are often an easy shorthand to confirm that someone has the skills. And if you really do have the skills then it’s not hard to get the qualification to prove it. For example, in scientific research which is my field, someone might say: “I can do research, I don’t need a PhD”. If you are such a great researcher then getting a PhD should be easy for you.
October 10, 2011
David
Chris, this article was amazing on so many levels! You managed to do something a writer rarely does and that is to touch the soul of your readers.
October 10, 2011
Carolyn
And you keep proving that dedication to your passion is really the biggest qualification of all! That will let you go after what you need to reach your vision. That’s why so many of us listen to you. You’re just like us, except with more flight mileage. ; )
October 10, 2011
noelle
Ditto to the favorite post comments. You rock Chris.
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October 11, 2011
alton
Your best post ever. Thanks.
October 11, 2011
Carolyn Barndt
LOVE. THIS.
I’ve been clobbering myself ever since a close friend unceremoniously (but very sanctimoniously) “dumped” me for what amounted to being utterly unable to force my decidedly square peg into a round hole. I have a “useless” philosophy degree, and have worked a string of entry level jobs I felt OK about for twenty years. Recently it’s been slowly dawning upon me that the reason I can’t find my niche in the world is because I HAVE TO CREATE IT.
Thanks for going on ahead and showing us it can be done.
October 11, 2011
Lisa
Inspiring–thanks, Chris. Public schools were formed and designed by industrialists with the purpose of making workers and consumers, NOT as we’re led to believe to educate us. (Really, look it up! They didn’t even try to hide what they were doing!) We are trained from childhood to think that we must find our place in their world–some of us know there’s a better way out there–we just have to find it!
October 11, 2011
Bg
Dear Sir, Your article just encouraged me my whtever-I-like-I-do attitude. Thanks.
October 11, 2011
Michael Pinter
What a Fantastic Post! I have four kids, my oldest is in High School and my wife and our friends are constatntly discussing all of the old-school paradigms like “if our child fails math, she won’t go to a great college” or “My child needs to get into Yale” etc. I laugh at these thoughts because I believe, that the past two decades have shown us clearly that anyone who belives in something(e.g. Steve Jobs) can accomplish anything without college, and without the ususal “formal Education” Today, a 20 year old can start something on the internet that they love and belive in and make more money than our parents ever dreamed of. Chris is a great example of that and this post makes it even more clear to me. I would much rather my children figure out what it is they WANT to do with their lives and then go do it, no matter where it lands them, then follow the “traditional” path and end up making good or even great money doing what they thought they were SUPPOSED to do with their lives.
October 11, 2011
Sylvia
You’re not unqualified. You know how to write and put your thoughts together in cogent fashion, and that’s a skill you had to learn. You have analytical abilities. You obviously have marketing abilities. In fact, I’d say you were the quintessential salesman. I bet you even read books, something a lot of truly unqualified people never do. And you’ve been very very lucky.
Personally, I think the last thing the truly unqualified need to hear is another justification for not knowing anything.
October 11, 2011
Amber J. Gardner
This is the reason I come here. This is the reason I subscribed to your blog. This is the reason why, if I had the money, I’d attend your conference and buy your products.
It’s because of THIS.
It’s because I’m also not qualified to do anything and I’m already 25 years old. Because I’m both terrified about my future and at the same time still ambitious and believe I have the potential to be great, despite having no qualifications.
It’s because your story allows me to believe that I’m going to be okay. That I’m not the only one and that maybe, just maybe, I will make it.
If I’m grateful for my life as it is, I’m definitely also grateful for you, your journey and your wise words.
Thank you.
October 11, 2011
Kim Kircher
In high school I worked hard to get all As. When I graduated with a 4.0 GPA I imagined that number would follow me around my entire life, magically opening doors for me. Not once in the 20-something years since I left high school has that number made a difference in my life. I currently work as a ski patroller and author. And no one ever asks what grades I got in school.
October 11, 2011
Ara Bedrossian
Affecting positive change is a pretty good qualification for a human being. Cheers.
October 11, 2011
Jeff Fleak
I was 16, and just found out the fry guy died (literally), I was promoted from the broom. I was the happiest person in the world. Then realized maybe just maybe I should not be in charge of hot oil. I moved on to making really cusioned waterbed rails. I can’t believe they let me go. After years of college and all the preverbial corporate jobs for twenty years since, I’m back finishing up my education and could not be any happier. Sometimes it may take awhile to figure it out, but it will be worth it in the end. Thanks for the great post.
October 11, 2011
Cherri
I had a great time reading your post! I laughed out loud while at work. I could just see 14 year old Chris dumping pots in the dumpster. I would never have even thought of that possibility. I agree with what you say about “qualifications” or lack there of. However, you are a talented communicator and that must be a qualification of some sort.
October 11, 2011
Sara
Hi Chris. I’ve been reading you for a while now and have never commented. But I couldn’t resist this time, because I needed to tell you that I think this is the best post you have ever written. Bravo, and thanks—for this one and all the others I never said thanks for
October 11, 2011
Sara (h-less)
Of course! How else did I get here? Believed in all the mainstream hooey and just couldn’t follow through. I’m grateful for my employment every day, though. It’s a bit like baseball: a game of failure, but even a .333 batting average is Hall of Fame material in post-season. And who taught them the game? And, by the way, what’s the singular for plethora?
October 11, 2011
moom
But Chris did go to college and even to graduate school. And Steve Jobs and Bill Gates also went to college. Jobs dropped out after one semester but stayed on in Portland for the next three semesters auditing classes. Both he and Jobs decided they didn’t want to complete their degrees but both benefited from their college experience. I think it is wrong to say from these that college is useless and my child doesn’t need to go to college. And I bet Jobs and Gates would have scored 800 on the GRE math test (which is real easy actually and doesn’t involve calculus etc.). Most people don’t use calculus day to day unless you are an engineer, economist etc. But calculus thinking and statistical thinking can be very useful in making sense of the world. You can really tell when you are arguing with someone who doesn’t have this kind of background and can’t think statistically about things…
October 12, 2011
Phil
@ SARA (H-LESS) surely the singular of plethora is ‘one’.
October 12, 2011
Joe
Chris, I thought this post was awesome, but it made me mad at the same time. Because I wish I had all that time back that I stressed over feeling like a fraud, and not being qualified to do big things in life. Maybe it was just youthful insecurity. Now that I’m older, I realize I’m still not qualified. This article went a long way in pointing out that, for most of us, it really doesn’t matter…
October 12, 2011
Jason Kallsen
Dude … possibly your greatest post ever. Seriously. And thank you.
October 12, 2011
Taylor Ondrey
Love it. People often treat qualifications as permission to do something. They don’t feel they have permission to do professional work in an area unless they have the qualifications. We work at getting degrees and certifications so we can have permission to work in a certain field or give advice in a certain area.
Just like a college degree doesn’t guarantee a good job, qualifications don’t guarantee someone is competent in their field. It only means they passed some test.
Thanks Chris
October 12, 2011
Jim Johnson
This is a wonderful call to action and a removal of excuses. I’m actually sending it on to my son, who is a sophomore in HS. It feels a little dangerous to have him read this! Quit school! Succeed! I’m afraid, but I know it’s the right thing. Couple this with a recent post on Tim Ferriss’ blog and I do believe he could break out of the standard path and love his life. Where do I find some balls?
October 12, 2011
Daniele V
Best AONC post ever.
October 12, 2011
Lainer
You’re more qualified than most of our politicians. Count yourself lucky.
October 13, 2011
John Sherry
Even though many industries demand a qualification or degree, the modern world is where most graduate and hold a degree in life lessons that they then share with the world. You can’t study surviving cancer or backpacking the world through retirement but you can be a professor of experience that others want to hear about. Mastery isn’t just on a piece of paper from a campus, it’s from hanging in there, persisting, and getting through life itself, and helping a few folks on the way.
October 13, 2011
Maria Nedeva
Great writing and a good story, Chris. Strangely, only the other day I was asking myself the question why is my employer paying me well and having a problem finding the answer. And I went all the way in education and qualifications. Brief story: expelled from nursery but learned a lesson – sometimes it is better to loose a battle to win the war. Then pretty close to plain sailing through school, university and two PhDs in two different countries (and fields; one in Sociology).
The competencies that help me earn my keep are not the ones learned in all these educational institutions; they are the ones that are my gift and I have developed, used and continue to work on. Research, analysis and writing,
October 13, 2011
Sage
So Good….. What a post. That is exactly the type of sharing that makes the internet not a waste of space.
Still pondering what all the takeaways could be. But then that might not be the point.
Bravo
~Sage
October 16, 2011
Kim
I could write basically the same post about my own skills. I can’t do higher math, can’t give correct change without a calculator, couldn’t wrap pallets for that matter either. But somehow I’ve gotten where I am and it’s the same faith in the universe that will hopefully get me where I want to go next.
Thank YOU for the great post.
October 17, 2011
Nina
I quit my job a few months ago and am trying to figure out what to do next and people keep asking me what my qualifications are, now more than ever. I love your post, one of my favourites so far. Thank you!
October 25, 2011
David Pederson
This was inspired. I did as many of the right things as I could to get the jobs I’ve had and no matter what they were, I always thought someone else should have gotten the job. So, those feelings are common to all of us.
I think it is because of folks like you that we can see it is the crappy voice that holds us back and not our ability to do something we want.
Well done, both the post and the living!
October 29, 2011
Ambassasdor Bruny
Simply amazing story Chris. Having only met you once, but being aware of some of the things you’ve done, I would have never guessed 90% of the info you shared. Keep going brother.
I find myself being very furtunate to have some pretty awesome people in my life. I’m not always sure how it happened, but I learned to quit asking “why” and say, “thank you.”
November 1, 2011
artgrab
Exactly – I’ve spent the last year discovering that I can succeed even though I didn’t do it the ‘proper’ way. My sister did that, and she’s happy, but it took a lot for me to realize that black-sheep status has a lot going for it, too!
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November 17, 2011
alua
A very interesting post. I actually have various qualifications (as in: university degrees) and I enjoy getting them (I am a postgraduate research student now), but I totally agree with you: people often don’t care about the qualifications you have. I have been offered teaching jobs (unsolicited) on the basis of being a native speaker, but with no qualifications (or experience) to teach that language, meanwhile, despite being perfectly bilingual, having qualifications and several years of experience, it’s essentially impossible for me to teach EFL in Asia, because most countries have a random “must have passport from specific country only” stipulation.
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November 17, 2011
Laurel
Thanks for the best laugh I have had in weeks – I just finished reading it out loud to my husband with pauses to wipe away tears and catch my breath – too, too funny and also too true!
One thing you are for sure, a great writer with a zany sense of humor!
November 17, 2011
Denise
Thank you SO MUCH for writing that. I laughed and laughed mostly because I have my own version of your story sans the successful website. Thanks for being so honest and grateful and for flipping on the switch. If I ever meet you, I’ll hug you.
November 29, 2011
Jean-Philippe
Chris Guillebeau at his best ! This is the reason why I like your blog, for these kind of posts where the writer is in full bloom and wonderfully refreshing. Thanks a lot !
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January 23, 2012
Darcy
Wow, you sound a lot like me. I bet you’re an ENFP. I’m really glad i stumbled upon your blog, i’m having the exact same issues and reading your blog reassures me that it’s okay not to follow the traditional path as long as i work hard and make smart choices along the way. Thank you!
February 12, 2012
Silv
Nice one. It reminds of a past job when I hired staff based on 10% skill, 90% attitude, simply because the job I could teach them, attitude I couldn’t.
March 2, 2012
RichUncle EL
This post hits a nerve in so many ways. How many times have the average person looked at a job they wanted and did not apply because the long list of qualifications needed turned them away. I have felt this way also and even now with a master’s degree in business I struggle to find the right type of work that interest me due to the long list of experience and qualifications and certifications for the financial work I really want to pursue. This world is really based on who you know more than what you can give.
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April 1, 2012
Ham
Great post! The formal education piece really hits home….I focused some of my collegiate endeavors on sociology too. Also, have an AA, BA, and MA by ‘learning the system’ and never took a standardized test for any program.
April 18, 2012
Linda Rood
This was the best thing I think I have ever read. So many people look down on people that haven’t went to college. I didn’t but I have a lifetime of experiences that they don’t understand.