Alix from the Netherlands writes in with a great question:
While goals are good to work towards, do you not feel like constantly pursuing things makes you run all the time and not ‘enjoy the moment’? What if, for example, while you’re standing in one country, and think ‘Hmm, I would really like to stay here longer..’ — I mean a real feeling, not a whim?
I don’t mean this as criticism, I am genuinely wondering. I have many goals and current things I am doing to work towards them, though I think of them more as directions which I can fork from (or back to) if I find worthwhile side streets – trying to listen to the surprises that come up, and to enjoy every day without always thinking ‘three are already past in this year’.
As I said, great question. The short answer in my case is that, yes, from time to time I would like to stay somewhere longer. I felt that way in Laos and Syria, for example. I wasn’t sure what to expect from Syria, so I didn’t plan to stay long—but then it turned out to be one of my favorite spots in the Middle East. All too soon, I had to turn around and head back to Amman and then onwards.
Before going to Laos, I felt like I already seen so much of Southeast Asia that another place wouldn’t be that different. (It’s not always popular to say so, but in several regions of the world, many of the places are quite similar.) Laos, however, was so fun that I wished I had more time.
Overall, though, I’m quite happy doing what I’m doing—my feeling is that I can always go back to places like Laos and Syria at some point later, and the reality is that I never would have been to either country in the first place if I hadn’t been traveling the way I do. It’s also true that when I leave somewhere, I’m often looking forward to what’s coming up next instead of wishing I had more time where I was.
I also like the actual experience of travel itself, as Robert Louis Stevenson put it:
“For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move.”
Like Stevenson, I travel for travel’s sake. I like the process of going from one place to another. I like airports, buses, shuttles, hotel rooms, trains, waiting rooms… and I like putting the puzzle pieces together: how can I reroute three different tickets that were volcanoed last month? How can I apply for visas for Burundi and Cameroon simultaneously? Will I have enough time for a side trip to Morocco before heading home through Asia?
Lately, there are a lot of pieces—but an easy puzzle wouldn’t be as much fun. Of course there are tradeoffs, and what works for me won’t work for everyone. But yes, I try to enjoy the moment wherever I am.
And by the way, whether any of us successful at enjoying the moment isn’t necessarily correlated to geography. Appreciating life is generally more of an internal decision instead of a response to external circumstances. If you’ve ever been happy during a stressful time at work or unhappy on a vacation, you understand how that works.
So in that regard, it’s better to find a way to enjoy whatever you can at any given time, even if your bus is leaving for Amman and you’ve only been in Damascus for a couple of days.
How about you—are you enjoying the moment today?
###
Image: Kate
May 13, 2010
Alexis
I hop into the car and just go for a drive, the dog sits on my lap and looks out the window. She loves it to. The experience of travelling, looking, smelling, it doesn’t matter where. 12 months ago I drove across Australia, people think I’m mad, just me and the dog. Driving means you are in the moment…..I love it!
May 13, 2010
Richard Howes
I am from South Africa.
I was never a traveller until I met my wife. She had been an exchange student to Canada and was a travel lover. Nine months after we got married we went to North Carolina to work on a summer camp for young children (5-11 years old). After that we bought a cheap car and travelled through 20 states and saw every major attraction driving over 7000 miles in a few months.
Before heading out after the camp we had a fairly detailed plan for the first few weeks. The plan didn’t last a day because the first camp site we had planned to stop at was a bust.
One example of our random plans was deciding to see the Florida Keys. “Key Largo is the first, biggest, in the song, great – we see it and we’re done.” Key Largo was so beautiful we decided to drive a bit longer and see more. Then there was 7-mile bridge. By then we decided we may as well see Key West (Hemmingway, famous etc.). Ended up staying in Key West for a week.
Time of our lives!
May 13, 2010
Kurt Swann
Enjoyed the post and comments. I also “travel for travel’s sake.” Here’s another quote with a similar idea . . . . . “The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see.” G. K. Chesterton . . . .
Sometimes I’m like a tourist at well known sites who “sees what he has come to see.” But most of the time I get more enjoyment out of a bus ride, crossing a remote border, or finding a place to do laundry.
I’ve heard it said that life is best when we can strike a balance between contentment and ambition. What works for me is thinking first about my values and philosophy of life. I then create goals, whether travel goals or otherwise, that fit in with those values and philosophy. When those are in sync, I don’t feel a great deal of conflict between “goals” and “moments” and enjoyment of the “moments” seems to take care of itself.
May 14, 2010
Richard
On the travel front, I don’t like to plan too much so that I have the option to “stand and stare”. I will book the flights and a hotel for the first few days but after that I will often “wing it”.
During a visit to Central America not too long ago our final trip barely resembled our initial plans due to disagreements with Lonely Planet! Some areas they warned about were like heaven on earth (possibly because all the smart people who’d read the guide stayed away?!) while other “hotspots” didn’t hold as much appeal as we expected. Luckily, we were able to adapt to those conditions and had the best trip ever.
However in my work life I think I can suffer from tunnel vision and task achievement syndrome just wanting to get something completed. I try to remain conscious of the steps I’m taking but interruptions while I’m working – no matter how nice – don’t tend to get the same appreciation as when I’ve “clocked off”.
May 14, 2010
Misha Herwin
All inspirational, as usual. Clicks in with a strange synchronicity to the way I’ve been feeling. Too much practical stuff, due to building work and not enough creativity. Yet great fun in decorating the new room and chatting to the builders. One way of looking at it, is that one day all these experiences will be food for the writing. Another is that this is all part of life’s flow. As other people have said, we only have this moment in time so make the best use of it.
Misha
May 14, 2010
connie barrett
Am I enjoying this moment? Maybe, sort of. Yesterday I took a miserable 11 hour bus ride in a third world country, came home to see that my little dog with whom I am obsessed had been mistreated and I slept for 3 hours before checking email and telephone messages. There are several unreasonable demands from angry people and I need to respond. In the past several years, I have become more passive and have gone to great lengths to avoid confrontation, allowing myself to be taken advantage of and ripped off rather than confront. However, I feel energized by the May 100 business forum and today I will stand up for myself without procrastinating and simply say no. I already responded to one and I will now do the others. I think I’m beginning to understand some things: while I don’t actually enjoy the responses I have to make, I think I can enjoy this moment of being assertive and I will enjoy the rest of my day. And stating my case isn’t the same as confrontation, is it?
May 14, 2010
Jim Greenwood
Chris,
It has been fascinating reading this stream of comments. Thank you to everyone who has commented, and again to you Chris for the observations and questions that kicked it all off.
I have used several of my moments – and enjoyed them thoroughly.
Have Fun,
Jim
May 14, 2010
Eric Normand
You can work on goals and enjoy the moment at the same time. Separate out your planning and your execution. Once you have planned out how to get to your goal, you can just enjoy the process without constantly looking ahead to see how close you are.
May 14, 2010
DigitalAngel
I think Alix asks an important question, because it is certainly possible to get caught up in working towards your goals as though they’re chores you have to cross off your to-do list. However, I very much agree with Sandra Lee, that having goals doesn’t have to prevent you from enjoying the moment. In fact, what I got from your post was that it is possible to push yourself onwards from one goal to another and still enjoy every moment of the experience. Even if you’re enjoying one moment or one country so much that you want to extend your stay, it is still possible to move forward and enjoy the following moment just much. Thanks for a thoughtful question and a thoughtful post!
May 15, 2010
Shelley
Another interesting discussion. I also love to travel. Sometimes I think it would be great to stay a little longer in a place, but then I wonder what I’ll be missing in the new destination…It’s a great question, that doesn’t have one right or wrong answer, it really is a question of what matters to you most. Thanks for the great food for thought.
May 15, 2010
Mike Ziarko Musing
I could agree more with this post.
We’re so busy chasing that next achievement, promotion, travel destination, or thing to buy. When we get it, we’re on to the next thing to do/buy/achieve/travel/whatever. As the old saying goes, “its not the destination, its the journey”. I’m not entirely sure about that. I’ve been guilty of that. We get caught up in the pursuit but don’t actually take the time to appreciate what we have when we get it. Taking the time to truly appreciate what you accomplish forces you to take stock and see whether it was worth the pursuit.
If you can’t just stop and enjoy the moment, then why are you chasing it?
Mike
May 16, 2010
Deep
I’m quite the opposite. I feel like my regular life has enough goals in it, I try to have no goals when I’m traveling. I try to wander as much as possible, minimize planning ahead, try to go where the person I just met says is fantastic, that sort of thing. Still, its great to hear your perspective. Wonderful blog.
May 16, 2010
Roy Abraham
Yes it’s definitely the journey, not the destination. But I admit that sometimes I’m too hung up on the adventure of “moving” that I don’t pause to enjoy the moment!
May 16, 2010
Alan Nash
Hello, I’m very new to this site and am impressed with the diversity of it’s participants. I feel REAL out of place, that I am not a world traveler. I do travel, but not out of the borders of the USA. I love to travel and meet new people and experience new environments. I am a cartoonist by hobby and a locomotive engineer by trade (that’s what pays the bills). I may have a little different perspective on Living the Moment in that we are raising our youngest daughters 2 boys and little girl 3 and a half, 19 months and 1 week respectively. 2 years ago, enjoying the moment became a whole new thing for us. I may not be the world traveler as most of you are but thanks to you people and Chris, I can travel though your eyes and words…Please accept the THANKS of a grateful reader
May 16, 2010
Emily
“The end of a melody is not its goal; but nonetheless, if the melody had not reached its end it would not have reached its goal either. A parable.”
Nietzsche
May 17, 2010
tom
having traveled rtw myself i came across this dilemna many times as well. like chris, i opted to see more with the thought that i could always come back to the places i liked most. though i also tried to budget in extra time so i could stay a little longer in those places (or with people) that were special. having all the friends at home living “vicariously” through me, reminded me to pause and enjoy where i was and what i was doing, because i knew all too soon i’d be the one stuck back in the office living vicariously through someone like chris.
May 17, 2010
Jennifer Moore
@Amber-If being at home, being comfortable, and enjoying your child is your bliss, then embrace it. It is not better or worse than anyone else’s way of being in the moment and enjoying it. It works for you, and it keeps you healthy, and that is what’s important.
For me, it’s being in my studio, losing myself in my various art projects.
I also love to travel, but I travel for the destination. I like being in a different place for a while (whether it yields killer photos or just good times.)
For me, a daily dose of enjoying the moment might be as simple as sitting in the garden for a few minutes before I leave for work or cuddling one of my cats.
Chris, I’m tired of repeating myself, but I will: Another GREAT post!
Jennifer Moore
JenniferLynn Productions, LLC
July 12, 2010
Nina
Hi,
Just came across your page. I find it so amazing and insightful. I am sorry to say that I am not enjoying my moment today. I just got back from another trip (Hawaii) and feel like a fish out of water. I love to travel and be adventurous. I just turned 30 and feel like I need a life change. I love tropical places and don’t know how much longer I can reside in this concrete jungle.Houston. I will read on.
Thanks