“Everything worth doing takes time. You have to write a hundred bad songs before you write one good one. And you have to sacrifice a lot of things that you might not be prepared for. Like it or not, you are in this alone and have to follow your own star.”Read More
"It feels very old-timey and theatrical to say 'This experience has changed me' but still things do happen that change us. When those things happen we can’t go back in time, we can only go forward or face the uncertain ambivalence between the past, present and the future."Read More
New research reveals that situational happiness or sadness may relate partly to age.
"Long ago, when I was 30 and he was 66, the late Donald Richie, the greatest writer I have known, told me: 'Midlife crisis begins sometime in your 40s, when you look at your life and think, Is this all? And it ends about 10 years later, when you look at your life again and think, Actually, this is pretty good.' In my 50s, thinking back, his words strike me as exactly right. To no one’s surprise as much as my own, I have begun to feel again the sense of adventure that I recall from my 20s and 30s. I wake up thinking about the day ahead rather than the five decades past. Gratitude has returned."Read More
Bob Dylan gave a rare 35-minute speech at a MusiCares event for the Grammys last night. It's all interesting, but here's my favorite part:
"Critics have made a career out of accusing me of having a career of confounding expectations. Really? Because that's all I do. That's how I think about it. Confounding expectations." "What do you do for a living, man?" "Oh, I confound expectations." You're going to get a job, the man says, "What do you do?" "Oh, confound expectations." And the man says, "Well, we already have that spot filled. Call us back. Or actually, don't call us, we'll call you."Read More
From The Diary of Anne Frank:
"In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. I simply can’t build up my hopes on a foundation consisting of confusion, misery, and death. I see the world gradually being turned into a wilderness, I hear the ever approaching thunder, which will destroy us too, I can feel the sufferings of millions and yet, if I look up into the heavens, I think that it will all come right, that this cruelty too will end, and that peace and tranquility will return again.”
Part of why I believe this too is that the alternative is too depressing to consider. So what happens when people hurt us, or when someone else does something to us that's totally unexpected? I guess we have to think about context, try to see it from their perspective, and so on.
And even when we’re wronged, I think we have to have grace. Again, what’s the alternative To refuse grace only hurts us in the end.Read More
Don Miller is the kind of guy that I implicitly trusted the first time I met. Not to psychoanalyze too much, but in general I’m not a very trusting person. I believe that most people are good, but I don’t necessarily trust a lot of people. With Don, though, I felt comfortable discussing personal stuff right away.
After a lunch meeting, he wrote me an email with more advice. I asked him if I could share part of it, and he agreed. Maybe it helps some of you, too? Here's Don:
"Rapid success is much more difficult to manage than failure, I believe. It's just like walking a tight rope. I think the thing is, success changes you radically, but nothing around you from the old life changes, so now you're a different person and to some degree larger than the small walls you've been living in. But it's all a bunch of tricks and lies. What matters in the end is taking the folks who loved you early with you into the new life as gingerly as possible."
Check out Don's book, Scary Close: Dropping the Act and Finding True Intimacy.Read More
Normally I’m not an auditory learner and have a hard time paying attention to lectures or podcasts. In the case of the “Brave New Year” program by Chris Brogan (not an affiliate link; I purchased it for regular price), however, I was able to go through the whole thing.
I particularly like what Chris had to say about the subject of acceptance. Here’s an excerpt:Read More
And other ways of applying perspective. “Guy from Minnesota says it’s cold in the winter. Guy from Mexico disagrees, says it’s hot in the winter. Both have a hard time realizing they’re each right based on their own unique life experiences. They call each other idiots in the comments section of news article that has…Read More
From Greg McKeown’s Essentialism: “As you evaluate an option, think about the single most important criterion for that decision, and then simply give each option a score between 0 and 100. If you rate it lower than 90 percent, then automatically change the rating to 0 and simply reject it. This way you avoid getting…Read More
Graham Green on writing a book: “I was trying to write a book that simply would not come. I did my daily five hundred words, but the characters never began to live. So much in writing depends on the superficiality of one’s days. One may be preoccupied with shopping and income tax returns and chance…Read More
“What about the main thing in life, all its riddles? If you want, I’ll spell it out for you right now. Do not pursue what is illusionary — property and position: all that is gained at the expense of your nerves decade after decade, and is confiscated in one fell night. Live with a steady…Read More
A conversation with David Remnick, editor of The New Yorker. Interviewer: The role of an editor is much broader today. Is there anything you feel uncomfortable doing, or is there anything you’re doing that you hadn’t expected to enjoy? D.R.: I enjoy all of it to one degree or another. There are days when you…Read More
The “Will I regret it in the future?” mindset can be very helpful in making decisions. From a New York Times article on protests in Hong Kong: “I’m not sure if this protest will really affect the decision by China, but I’m sure if I don’t come I will regret it in the future,” said…Read More